A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, I was given a food processor. I did not have one, and was trying to make do with a blender to make horseradish with fresh horseradish root from my garden. My other-mother Liz (who has been best friends with my mom since they were 9 years old and has always been there for me for my entire life), took pity on me and gave me a food processor she owned, but didn’t use. I was thrilled. It was a beautiful Cuisinart Pro Custom 11. It had a whole bunch of different attachments for slicing, shredding, chopping, and mixing, and the 11-cup size was just perfect for me. It was love at first sight.
I have used this food processor multiple times weekly – for over 30 years now. Every time I pull it out to use it, I think of Liz and how much I appreciate her sweet gift. It’s one of my most treasured kitchen gizmos.
So imagine my dismay when I pulled out my old, trusty food processor on Saturday to rice my cauliflower, and was met with total silence. My old girl just wouldn’t work. She didn’t make any noise. Flashbacks of our amazing (and even a few crazily unsuccessful) recipes that we created together over all the years came flooding back at me. The old girl had whirred her last batch. :(
All attempts at resuscitation failed in spite of my sweet hubby’s valiant efforts.
After a respectful mourning period which involved equal parts of humming taps, whining, and lamenting the fact that I would now have to grate the whole big head of cauliflower by hand, I set off on researching a replacement. Because my old girl had served me so faithfully for so long (and because Consumer Reports rated her so highly still), I decided to replace my old girl with a new version of the same exact model. And using some of my superhuman shopping skills (this is my ONE superpower), I was able to get an AMAZING deal on this new girl. Better yet, she arrived in one business day.
And that day was today.
Ta-da! Introducing, the new, the lovely, the shiny and amazing . . . .
Isn’t she pretty?
While I unpacked her, I hugged her and bonded with her and we made plans for our lovely future together, beginning with just what I would let her make for me first.
Other than the shiny stainless steel finish, she is an exact replica, including all the extra attachments. Apparently even Cuisinart realized that they achieved perfection and found no reason to change the design in the last 30+ years.
While introducing her to my hubby, he was looking over all her parts and noticed something. He asked where the old food processor was, and I quickly brought her in and set her down next to the new girl. He looked at the old lid, then looked at the new lid, and with an adjustment of a twist and a snap and a click, my old girl whirred back to life.
(It turns out her feeder tube was not clicked back into the proper place to make the engine work. That alone should teach me to never, ever again take it apart and clean it so carefully).
OH. EM. GEE. Are you kidding me? Now what do I do? I LOVE my old, faithful girl, and have 30+ years of bonding with her. But my NEW girl is SO SHINY and so – so new! And I got SUCH a DEAL! And I already have bonded with her.
So here’s my dilemna. Now I am stuck with two awesome fully-functioning food processors. And that is my Tale of Two Processors.